Table of Contents - June 2007

Feature Article: “Five Tips for Getting Fit as a Family!”
A Good Read: “The Tween Years”
Free Time: Bouncing the Red Ball
Positive Discipline Methods: Make it a Game
Upcoming Classes
 


Free Parenting Class on Self-Esteem Mon., June 18

For those of us who want to take positive action to help prevent tragedies such as the one at Virginia Tech, I'm offering the third and final class in my series of free parenting teleclasses. "Self-Esteem Boosters Every Child Can Benefit From" the last class in the series, will provide you with concrete actions steps you can take to help your child feel confident in five key areas. Self-esteem is critical to a child’s success so please join me for this important class.

The free teleclass, "Self-Esteem Boosters Every Child Can Benefit From," will be Mon., June 18 at 7 p.m. CT (8 p.m. ET, 6 p.m. MT, 5 p.m. PT).

Sign up now at http://www.getparentinghelpnow.com/SelfEsteem.htm. Or call Toni at 612-810-8687 with any questions.

What's more important than your child?

 


Get Fit as a Family!  Here are Five Tips.

So many of us struggle to keep up an exercise program. We start out strong and then peter out. I thought it would be interesting to look at ways to incorporate fitness into our everyday life and to focus on ways we can do this as a family.

I interviewed Howie Jacobson, the director of www.fitfam.com , who has a Ph.D. in health education. Jacobson’s goal is to help parents who are struggling to get fit and to raise fit kids in a crazy, busy world. Howie has some fun ideas that I’d love to share with you.

Q. What barriers do you think hold parents back from exercising?

A. There are no barriers, really, unless someone has a physical disability. Some people think they have to join the gym to get fit and others start running. The problem is that 70% of people quit within three months of joining a gym and most runners start strong, but drop off unless they’re in a running group. The point of exercise should be to move your body in pleasurable ways to develop fitness.

Q. Your view is that parents tend to think of fitness as being exclusive of family rather than inclusive of family. What do you mean by that?

A. Most people think of exercise as separate from their real life. While their body may be at the gym, their mind is somewhere else. We need to take care of our bodies for the rest of our life and embed fitness into our life as much as possible. If exercise is something we check off on our to-do list, it becomes a chore.

Q. On your blog, you say that “wildness is a path to wellness and happiness.” Please elaborate.

A. Let me give you an example. There was a kids’ party in our neighborhood and the kids were having a blast jumping in a giant inflatable, running in the meadow and playing ball. All of the parents were standing around stiffly watching with their arms folded. So I started playing with the kids and the other parents were staring at me. I want to give parents permission to be happy anytime and to just live with joy like kids do.

Q. You have five tips for making fitness fun and getting in shape as a family. What are the five tips?

A. Tip #1: Indoor dance party.

I recommend that parents take this step privately, in their homes. Just put on danceable music and go at it with complete abandonment. Dance with your kids and you’ll get exercise.

Tip #2: Chase games.

I’ve never met a kid who didn’t like these games. Play tag or hide and seek or go to a playground with them. I can guarantee you that 10 minutes of this type of activity is a better work out than going to the gym.

Tip #3: Play any sports or games.

Play catch, football, basketball, lacrosse, or any other sport, but really engage with your child when you do it. Try to come up with 10 ways to make the activity more fun. The kids will have more fun if you have fun, too. Seize the moment and take your cue from them. They will remind you that your body can bring you joy.

Tip # 4: Go out in nature.

We live in a weird society where we survive on brains rather than our bodies. I think it is healing and necessary to go out in nature and use your body again to hike, walk in the river or climb trees. We need to connect to the source of life and if we do, we’ll grow spiritually and physically.

Tip # 5: Look to the circus.

Be the strong man and bench press your kids or twirl them like an airplane. Try to stand on your hands. Do pistols (one-legged squats) with your kids and add challenges. Your kids will be better than you and they’ll love it.

Q. You state that environment is a key factor for being successful in meeting fitness goals. Tell us more about that.

A. Environment is a big factor. You want to set up your environment to make it easy to get exercise. For instance, I put straps on a door. I have space to do push-ups. I have a medicine ball I can toss and play with and I have space for doing lunges.

Q. What other ideas can you share?

A. I have tons of examples on my website, www.fitfam.com, under the “whee” section. I blog and take videos about ideas I’ve used with my kids. I’m not big on equipment, but some things that can make it fun are medicine balls, a jump rope, tubing and a power wheel (which are available at Lifeline). Anything that you can do with your kids that creates a mindset of play will work.
And start small. Do just one thing for two minutes with your kids that you both like. Make it easy and if it works, do it for four minutes the next time.

Jacobson’s website is: www.fitfam.com.

 


Positive Discipline Options

This idea comes from the June, 2007 issue of Parents. The article, “The Fun Mom’s Guide to Discipline” has ideas for kids who don’t listen, don’t share, ransack drawers, are ungracious gift openers or are silly in the wrong places.

The idea is that you look at a situation that has been troublesome for your child, or that you anticipate will be a problem. Then you create a game to teach the child a better response and play it before the event occurs.

So, for instance, if it’s your child’s birthday and you’re afraid that s/he might say something awful/embarrassing about a gift that s/he receives you could play the “Gracious Gift Opener” game before the big day. The writer, Jody Mace, suggests having everyone in the family wrap up a truly awful “gift” like an old sponge or a partially used bar of soap. Then you gather as a family and open up each of the awful gifts and try to come up with something nice to say like “The green on that sponge matches my shirt!” so your child gets in the practice of saying nice things under the worst circumstances. Then, it’s more likely that your child will be able to come up with a positive comment when Granny gives him paisley underpants.

For more fun ideas, you can go to www.parents.com/june.

 

Upcoming TeleClasses

Take these classes from the comfort of home! You'll join other parents, via telephone, for parenting tips and a lively discussion all while sitting in your favorite armchair! There's no need to waste time driving to classes when you participate from home or your office in a 'teleclass.'

“Self Esteem Boosters Any Child Can Benefit From” Positive self-esteem is a critical factor in the development of all children. While self-esteem is a complex matter, this class will provide concrete tools to help your child feel confident and capable.  Practical suggestions to help your child grow stronger in five areas will be provided. Mon., June 18, 7 p.m. CT (8 p.m. ET, 6 p.m. MT, 5 p.m. PT) Register at:  http://www.getparentinghelpnow.com/SelfEsteem.htm.

Upcoming Classes

“Relief for Homework Headaches” – Wed., June 13, 7:30 p.m. Crossroads Elementary School.

“Siblings Without Rivalry” – Tues., June 19, 12:30 p.m. and 2 p.m., Wells Fargo.

Toni offers 17 different parent education classes. If you’d like to book Toni at your company or organization, please go to:   http://www.familiesfirstcoaching.com/Pages/Speakerspage.html  
 

A Good Read

Each month a parent provides a review of a parenting book they've enjoyed. Please e-mail toni@familiesfirstcoaching.com to share a good read with other parents.

“The Tween Years” by Donna Corwin

“I really liked this book because it’s very straightforward and it has lots of ideas to try and charts that are helpful. The book is meant for parents with kids ages 10-13 years old and it helped me realize that my daughter is doing exactly what she’s supposed to be doing! It also helped me to see that if I take the time and energy right now to handle attitude problems or anger issues or boundary violations that we’ll have fewer problems when she hits the teen years.

One of the issues she noted to be “normal” was talking back. The child is trying to define who she is and is questioning your values and how hers may differ from yours. However, you have to draw the line to find a balance between self expression and disrespect.

Another important idea is to back off and let the child learn from her own mistakes. We shouldn’t try to solve all of our child’s problems for her, but let her stumble sometimes. The author also offers a chapter on problem solving strategies to use with your child to help her explore options and solutions.

Issues like chores, curfew, boy/girl relationships, clothes and body image, hair, friendships, messy rooms, homework and organization are all covered in the book. I found it very helpful!” Julie Ledy, Roseville, MN



 

"Free" Time!

What does your family do for fun that doesn’t cost a lot of money? Please share your ideas.

"One of my daughters went on a walk with me and brought a huge, red plastic ball along. She was bouncing it as we went and I thought we would feel more connected if we bounced it back and forth while we walked. It turned out to be really fun because we’d see how high we could bounce it, we’d try to bounce it off the other person’s head and then we tried bouncing it over the person so we’d have to run farther and faster to catch it. This ties into just what Howie Jacobson was saying in the lead article. Follow your child’s lead and you can turn almost any activity in a fun outing.” Toni
 

Toni Schutta, Publisher, Families First Coaching Newsletter

Toni Schutta is a Parent Coach with a Master's Degree in Psychology and 12 years experience working with children and families. She's also the mother of two wonderful children, a Licensed Psychologist, a certified graduate of the Mentor Coach Foundations Program and a member of the International Coach Federation.

Families First Coaching is an organization devoted to building strong families by empowering parents with practical information, easy-to-use tools and helpful resources that will help you be the best parent possible. Individual parent coaching sessions are available along with parent-to-parent support groups and parent education classes. Check out the website at http://www.familiesfirstcoaching.com  for a complete list of services.

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